A new milestone in my life, modern medicine has just offered me 12 years of fertility; June 6, 2018, 10 of my oocytes have been frozen.
A year that I think of doing it, but only 6 months since my first appointment at the Eugin Clinic in Madrid, a clinic specialised in fertility.
What a relief! I’m feeling that I can plan the rest of my life again, my future is safe in a… freezer.
To be honest if my ex hadn’t left me, I would have never considered it. And yet from my point of view, every woman should do it as soon as possible. How many women have had difficulty having a child? Cryopreservation gives you another chance ... It's a life insurance, an insurance to give life.
Like most women, I imagined finding Prince Charming, getting married, buying the house of our dreams, adopting a beagle or a chow-chow, and then having wonderful children. Just now, life has decided otherwise. As for marriage, well I have already satisfied my dream with my solo wedding in Santorini. Now, I wish to become a mother. The problem is that my body and my ovaries have an expiry date that is getting close.
Before age 27, the probability of becoming pregnant is around 80%, by the age of 37, there is a 52% chance of being pregnant and it decreases day after day.
Probability of pregnancy (chart provided by Timefreeze)
WITHOUT frozen eggs
WITH frozen eggs
After 41 years old, the percentage plunges and there is only 36% of chance of being pregnant when you’re 42.
Of course, it also depends on your health and your body, these are statistics and there are always exceptions. Let's be clear, storing frozen eggs is only the first step, it doesn’t mean that you’ll be pregnant...
I then decided to opt for the cryopreservation of my oocytes, a process that will postpone my infertility by 10 years. To my surprise, I discovered that is not allowed in 3 European countries, Austria, Malta and France! However, in France it can be accepted for medical reason or egg donation. French women usually go to Belgium or Spain to perform this procedure.
In Australia, the first country where women had access to this method, it’s a common practice and it’s encouraged there. Now living in Europe, I’ve chosen Spain which is the European leader in the field and performs more than 60% of oocyte collection.
The time and money to finance this project is what I save for later. This is the price for not having regrets.
A friend told me how emotionally it was easier to handle this situation alone than in a relationship.
So yes, it's difficult to manage all of it alone but I'm strong and resilient, and it's for a good reason. I do it for myself but not only, I think about my future partner who may want children from me. I also think of one of my gay friends who wants to become a father someday, and then to my little sister. Who knows who may need my resources?
Men can procreate more or less at any age, they are not aware of this but they should because unless they are in a relationship with a very young woman, they will experience too the problems of infertility. If this is the gentleman who has a disorder, madame will be able to wait for him to be in good shape.
From now on, big American companies have understood this need and are financing for their employees the measures of procreation and access to parenthood.
To name just a few: Apple, Facebook, Estée Lauder, Spotify, Netflix, Patagonia ...
You never know what life will be and unfortunately this preservation is strongly recommended in the case of endometriosis, or before starting chemotherapy for cancer.
I took the liberty to prolong my fertility, a freedom that is priceless! And I hope a right to women that will be acquired in the coming years as are the right to contraception and abortion.
Thanks to the team at the clinic who cared for me from A to Z, and a special thanks to Dr. Manuel Izquierdo and the nurse Beatriz, so attentive and very kind.
Read Part 2:
Song : Only love can hurt like this by Paloma Faith